The brave mother of a Newhall baby who lived for only 17 minutes has told how she struggles to leave the house some days, talks about her son every single day and has lost friends since his death 38 weeks ago.

Donna Willday, has shared her devastating story in a bid to raise awareness about baby loss for Baby Loss Awareness Month which takes place in October.

Miss Willday, 37, suffered four miscarriages before her and her partner Brad, 42, found out they were expecting Blake. After a happy and healthy pregnancy, the pair were heartbroken when their baby boy was born nine weeks prematurely.

Despite doctors doing all they could, Blake died after only 17 minutes.

Now, almost nine months after the tragedy, Donna has told how her life was turned upside down by the loss and that there is no easy way to get over losing a child.

Miss Willday, who is also mum to Chloe, 19, said: "I have good and bad days but Brad has been brilliant. What people don’t always realise is that you don’t just lose a baby, you lose a life.

"It's the chance to see their first tooth, their first smile; all of those special moments that you think you are going to share with your child will never happen for you.

Baby Blake lived for just 17 minutes

"I think a lot of people think because he was just a baby and he wasn’t here for very long that we should have started to get over it after the funeral but I don’t know how we are supposed to do that."

Donna said she and Brad make sure Blake is "part of their day" and their coping technique has seen her lose friends.

She said: "I know some people are genuinely uncomfortable because they don’t know how to talk about it but talking about Blake is my favourite thing to do. He might not have been here for long but he was still here and I love showing off pictures of him.

"Some friends have let me rant, cry, get angry and use them as an outlet whereas other people have responded in very different ways.

"Some people go out of their way to be overly nice and it is forced and their faces are full of pity, whereas some people who I used to count as friends are just plain rude and ignore me altogether.

Donna and Brad are trying to get through their grief one day at a time

"I have lost a lot of friends after what happened and they have turned their backs on me but I think that is down to a lack of education.

"My advice is that if you know someone it has happened to be there for them; even if they don’t want to talk about the baby they will want to talk about something. No-one wants to think about their baby being forgotten."

Donna said she still cannot believe the stigma and lack of awareness attached to the subject as it happens "more than people think."

She said: "It annoys me that there is awareness for things like breast cancer all year round but stillborns and baby loss are only talked about during October for this awareness month.

"It shouldn’t be that way; it makes people think it shouldn’t be talked about and that is when it becomes a taboo subject.

"Fifteen babies die every day, and that is not counting miscarriages, while one in four women will have a miscarriage in their lifetime – but it is not talked about. I have been that woman five times now.

"Some things are so openly talked about so why is this brushed under the carpet when it is so important?"

Despite Donna admitting that the "pain will always be there" her, Brad and Chloe are looking forward to the future the best way they know how.

She said: "I would not want anyone to go through this because it is something that we will keep with us forever. It is true that it is incomparable and indescribable; you don’t understand the pain until you have been through it yourself.

"It is the parents who have to get out of bed every day knowing they can’t hold their own little boy or baby girl, that is the hardest part and that is our life now. Some days I can’t leave the house but me and Brad have talked about the possibility of having another baby in the future when the time is right.

"If we were to go on and have another child we wouldn’t be replacing Blake at all and the baby would know about Blake and that he is their big brother in heaven."